Already? I can't believe it! Didn't I just post that photo of the MadHatter? What has happened? Here we are on the precipice of Christmas looking into a new year with all the wonder an awe we had at this time last year! Time to evaluate, assess, look forward to another new beginning. So I am sitting here looking at my shoe closet for "inspiration" wondering what my future holds...and I have decided...some of these dudes have to leave. I haven't worn some of them the entire year, and while they are still nice, I doubt seriously I will wear them next year.
I am sure someone will love them though. I counted 10 pairs, that I most likely will never wear. I counted 2 brand new that i haven't worn because, well, I haven't been anywhere I could wear them. Will I be going anywhere I can wear them? Not if my life stays as it is right now...OK I see it, time for some changes. Either gonna have to make plans to go somewhere I can wear them, or let go of them too. They just sit there as a reminder to me, that I really don't get out enough. To get all dressed up and go where? I suppose what I need to do is join a charitable organization and participate in Gala events, so I can actually use these things, or donate them to the organization.
This brings me to the question: Why do I have this overwhelming urge to buy these beautiful dresses, shoes, etc when I have nowhere to go in them? I know this sounds foolish, but really, it tells me that there is something inside me wanting to feel beautiful, go out and have some fun...and come home with aching feet! I am left with this question hanging over my head, like a thought bubble, "Who have you become?"...YIKES!! I don't want to examine questions like that. They scare me. Where the heck are my Blue Suede Shoes and how can I get them back on? Or, do i need the red boots? How easy it is to slip back into the mundane, the routine the survival mode. How easy it is to allow yourself to stop living, to try to find some counterfeit form of "peace". So there it is, my goal, for 2011: Find my way out of this pit, get rid of shoes that have no pizzazz, step out in those pretty ones I never wear,(figuratively speaking) and go find something meaningful to do with my life. Like Film School in Hollywood. Create some beauty, tell some meaningful stories, get out of this shoebox. I wonder if they are ready for me?
